...GO taj!

tantananan! here i am again, pouring my mind and my heart's content to the world while listening to shakira's waka-waka...
Oh yeah it's substantially incorrect coz the world won't hear it anyway  because technically, i don't have a single follower yet- this is because of the fact that i am a newbie to blogging. I tried this only out of boredom and im doing my entry again out of "superbly nothing" to do. I've watched all of my dvd's over and over again and i've finished all the books that i bought.

oh, you may ask why i have full of time on hand??? this is because im unemployed. Not because of lack of opportunity nor absence of qualification. Not even out of laziness but a choice.
 After i took the bar, i wanted to breath, i didnt want to put limits on my self, i didn't want somebody to boss me around, and i didn't want to wake up so early. What i did was i traveled ...i went to places where i've never been before, i did things which i voluntarily deprived myself of during my review. I tried new things like extremes such as ziplines. I went to pools or beaches whenever i wanted without being concious of the time spent, i went to movies and watched every new film at the mall, rearranged my closet and updated my wardrobe, made clippings and compilations.. i spent plenty of time in front of my laptop playing video games.

I did those things for 6 months, unproductive as it may seem but atleast i enjoyed. It was until my bar result, and now i have left of nothing to do. Jobless, broke, without direction.

I pondered for two nights, i brainstormed alone, i have thought of so many things on what shall i do next and now i have the answer.

I realized i should never lose hope, courage and most especially faith. God never fails, he always hear our prayers. i should give myself one more chance, the chance to become more focused, more diligent, to do more where ive done less. I have spent so much time for this dream, and not pursuing it because im discouraged will put everything in vain.
I won't die a loser.

time to ponder

Disappointed but not devastated- this is what i felt when i received the long awaited news. Yesterday was the result of our bar exam and unfortunately i didn't make it. I got the news from my lawyer friend Mar who phoned me. i know it was hard on his part to deliver me the bad news, i felt it in his voice that he was sad for me but he just tried to make it sound normal.

Maybe a lot of people may wonder why it's so big deal on our part if we ever fail. this is because of the hard work, the diligence, the efford and of course the money spent. Not only that, all the lost opportunities and the chances having passed on our hands because we've focused so much on the review.
A lot of sleepless nights, there were times that i literally slept with my books and hugged them to sleep.. oh well not to mention how it gradually increased the grade of my glasses, and the 9years that i hurdled. It was hard and now its harder.

It hurts but it hurt me more to see my loved ones especially my parents who are even more hurt to have seen me failed.

This morning as i woke up, i pondered on what shall i do with my life now. will i give another chance to myself and kick some ass or will i consider a career shift???

They say that the only thing that cannot be recycled is TIME so be wise enough not to waste it because when its gone, you can no longer go back to it....ill think about it and so till the next post, you will learn my decision.